a plate of pickles please

I think I jinxed myself by telling that story about the carpark fiasco, fridays=subway after running with Friday Night Running Crew, and as my dog is a big exercise whore and my Pa is away leaving the burden of huge runs with me, Maggie has been coming with us, and so I have to tie her up outside subway while we eat, which I feel mega bad about because I treat my dog like a human. bite me. So thus I order her meatballs just in a salad base and take them out for her dinner. YES MY DOG EATS SUBWAY, WHATEVR. so last week it was a girl I used to play netball with and she was all lolz what the hell and laughing and whatever. And this week...the car park person was there!!
Man I didn't even know she worked at Subway, and I had to ask her for a plate of meatballs..for my dog. I don't know why that's a big deal BUT IT IS TO ME. and she was all ..a plate of pickles? Why would I want a plate of pickles? ,pre to the point, why would my dog want a plate of pickles?

It was my Oma's (Grandma to the power of dutch) birthday yesterday. I would've completely forgotten if I hadn't run into my Auntie and Uncle in McDonald's and I was all err? this isn't Parkes? And they were like, yeah we came up for the weekend for Oma's birthday. And I was like OH SHIT I...didnt forget? not at all.
Anyways then Anna rung and was like we're going out for Dinner tonight if you want to come, tonight being last night, and I was like yeah I can't cos I'd really rather spend my night with Joe then a table full of two-faced hipocrits, minus a select few I have trials. And then mum was all guilt guilt guilt. And I was like, goddamn i feel guilty. Then I rung her for her birthday:

Oma: hello
Me: Hi Oma!! Happy Birthday!!!
Oma: thankyou
Me: It's Olivia
Oma: ok, thankyou for calling darling, i love you bye
me: THE FUCK, you call that a phone conversation!?!?!

So yeah, guilt erased. I will however, share the text messages my cousin James sent to me during the night. We are each others salvation at these events and this is the only reason i regret skipping it:

Hey there it's ur cuz, who loves the ranga and where the hell are you?? I'm at the impy for Betsy and T your old man is apparently out so who know what u/joe are up 2.
about 5 minutes later And on top of that im stuck with the knob and geebe is shittier then a penguin in a desert, she is making a real scene

yeah so they cracked me up a fair bit and made me super wish that my phone wasn't fucked like a slut. seriously what the hell. Has anyone else got the new nokia and it doesnt send fucking text messages all of a sudden. Well what was the new nokia around 6 months ago, don't know if it still is. Point is. fucker!

thats all folks x